i as most moms look forward to a night out. although most of the time my 'nights out' include all the kids and just sitting at someones house and laughing till our sides hurt. tonight. i have filled my BFF obligations by purchasing, for my best friend, lawn seats at the aerosmith concert. yay me! as i sit here, at 1500, i realize that a month ago when i bought the tickets i really didnt realize i would be in the full throws of more remodeling. i have my weekend work bag packed, i have showered and gotten dressed, halfway fixed my hair, and because this is texas dont think that i will be applying any make up. i look horrible enough as it is without having base and mascara pouring down my face. this year, 2009, i have been to more concerts that i have in say...maybe close to five years. but i am enjoying myself. i always thought my 30's would be full of fun. both with the family and as an adult. my BFF is as close to family as one can get without blood relations getting in the mix. i love her. she has been sooooooo excited by our concert tonight. she has wanted to go see aerosmith since she was 12. which has been...well...a while. lol. well tonight is the night. i have felt so bad this week because she has called to try to plan things and get things nailed down as to when we are leaving and what time and yada yada. and here i have been worrying and working and so busy this week that i have not been a 'good friend' by being happy and enabling her planning. i feel horrible for this. i feel like i should have been more excited in her excitement. but yet again i have been wound up in my own issues. for this i am sorry. it just struck me how horrible i have been about this. almost as if its a burden. but i think it stems from the thought that i am having to get so much done and not enough time. im sure once we get in the car and realize, like we always do, that there are no kids, no bothers, and nothing but fun ahead i will be giddy and dumb. right now, as i sit here waiting for my hair to dry with the unruly curls that have cursed me my entire life, i just cant find the happiness. i only see the extra hours of time i am missing out on. *sigh* i have to wake up at 0400 to be at work at 0500 for a 17 hour work day. then on to four hours of sleep to go back and do another 17 hours of work on sunday. did i mention i have a job that if im sleepy or not paying attention at all i can literally kill someone?? ughhh yeah. to turn around and drive an hour home sunday exhausted to turn around and get up monday around 0800 to hang four doors and work on the kitchen. i love my house. im glad its getting done the way i want it but i just feel like my plate overfloweth. my dinner plate has turned into a buffet. sheesh.

1 Comment

1. Busymomsteph on July 17, 2009 at 4:50 PM

   Ok First of all, Girl you could dip me in honey and hit a bee hive and I would still be out of my mind excited. You are the greatest friend, soul sister and everything else I could have asked for. You are the only reason that I am not fully convinced that Karma is taking her vengance on me for past offenses. So settle down sister we'll have a great time and I plan on loading up the villagers and coming next week to help you out with the house, there is no way I'm letting you do it on your own.. Besides if I'm not there to monitor you, you could seriously f* it up... you know I am the remodel queen after all. hahaha just kidding. I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH !!!1