in my life there are some things that i think i truly loved that i let go without much of a fight. in some of those situations i really didnt have a choice. nature took over. or the big G decided i needed to head in another path. or things just didnt add up. and i had to let go of something that i didnt want to.

one thing i have to say i would never give up fighting for is my right as a mother. other things are: my children. my family. my closest friends. people that have made an impact on my life in a significant way.

in this drive to hold on to things. i have a bad habit of taking on 'causes'. people that arent as...worldly as i am. and thats not meant to sound conceited. some people freeze up in situations. some people cant think straight when confronted. people that cant get the right words out at the right time. or play the game when you dont lose but dont have to lie to win. i unfortunately have talents. they have served me well. i have friends and family that can figure these things out. but i also have friends and family that arent. right now i have someone that i feel is going to lose some very important things. she gets upset, intimidated, frustrated. and then just gives up. i am trying to help her. as much as i can. i know how to fight for what she needs to be fighting for. but i cant make her. i can only talk to her and help her. if she heeds it good. if not she will lose it. i have thought about this and thought about this and thought about this. and i have come to the conclusion that all i can do is talk. and hope she listens. tmw will be the day. i hope that the big G is with her. and helps her hear me. and understand.

there is also someone that i want to fight for in my life. a guy. i have been trying to fight for a few years. i have known him for a while. and have grown to like him. a lot. but things just keep getting in the way. i think hes someone worth fighting for. like i feel he will play a part in my life. but we will see. i wont give him a name yet. maybe in a few posts. i need to think of a good name for him. until then he will remain anonymous.